Tindering My Resignation
At the moment I'm not that bothered by dating in general. I've never really enjoyed online dating as it isn't very spontaneous. But... I still use the apps... mainly to try and find friends and neighbours so I can have a nosy and a bit of a giggle. Tinder became the latest craze and a couple of my friends have got it too.
After a while you all develop your own strategy when it comes to choosing Tinder candidates... here's a quick guide to mine...
- If you know them/know of them click YES. It's a talking point if it comes up a match. If they come to you and say "I see you clicked yes" you can either admit it or, if your intention was to take the piss, say... "I just clicked yes because I thought someone should so you didn't feel rejected." Of course you say it in a really sensitive way! Or "so you want to get me in to bed?!" Much banter to be had.
- When you load your profile it gives you the option to adjust the photo and centre it. If you can't do this simple thing and there's no reason for it... NO.
- Sentences are never continuous through five paragraphs with no punctuation. There are also selected capital letters included when writing the English language. U R using txt speak. Do these things sound like you? Then... NO.
- More than 10 things in common? If they are actual things and not just the groups with random funny stuff... YES.
- Gingers always get a second look, even if they fail the picture alignment test. They're my weakness... YES.
- Extreme sports... over two different types of extreme sport that you are participating in in photos? It's a NO. I like being a spectator, but if you feel that you need to show them all off you'll probably want me to try them.
- Multiple people in the picture... this is not a "spot the thing that's the same" contest. NO.
It may seem harsh, but if you're going to punctuate every mutual match with "would you like to send a message or keep playing?", then I am fully within my rights to treat it as a game.
Whether this is true or not I don't know, but I was told that people who have liked you come out first in your list when you go on. I hadn't been on for a while... I'm going through judging a book by its cover... I get a mutual match and I keep playing. A couple later I see someone who lives nearby, lovely but a little odd [this does work as an exception to the "someone you know" rule] and I click no. The next one I click yes on and get a mutual like. So on this logic this odd guy has clicked like... when you know something you cannot un-know it.
This may have been a sign, but who can give up such a fun game?
I do of course try to engage in some of the mutual matches but either they didn't actually like my profile or my quirky question of the week put them off... this week on Tinder... "If you could be a biscuit, what biscuit would you be, and why?"
After a while you all develop your own strategy when it comes to choosing Tinder candidates... here's a quick guide to mine...
- If you know them/know of them click YES. It's a talking point if it comes up a match. If they come to you and say "I see you clicked yes" you can either admit it or, if your intention was to take the piss, say... "I just clicked yes because I thought someone should so you didn't feel rejected." Of course you say it in a really sensitive way! Or "so you want to get me in to bed?!" Much banter to be had.
- When you load your profile it gives you the option to adjust the photo and centre it. If you can't do this simple thing and there's no reason for it... NO.
- Sentences are never continuous through five paragraphs with no punctuation. There are also selected capital letters included when writing the English language. U R using txt speak. Do these things sound like you? Then... NO.
- More than 10 things in common? If they are actual things and not just the groups with random funny stuff... YES.
- Gingers always get a second look, even if they fail the picture alignment test. They're my weakness... YES.
- Extreme sports... over two different types of extreme sport that you are participating in in photos? It's a NO. I like being a spectator, but if you feel that you need to show them all off you'll probably want me to try them.
- Multiple people in the picture... this is not a "spot the thing that's the same" contest. NO.
It may seem harsh, but if you're going to punctuate every mutual match with "would you like to send a message or keep playing?", then I am fully within my rights to treat it as a game.
Whether this is true or not I don't know, but I was told that people who have liked you come out first in your list when you go on. I hadn't been on for a while... I'm going through judging a book by its cover... I get a mutual match and I keep playing. A couple later I see someone who lives nearby, lovely but a little odd [this does work as an exception to the "someone you know" rule] and I click no. The next one I click yes on and get a mutual like. So on this logic this odd guy has clicked like... when you know something you cannot un-know it.
This may have been a sign, but who can give up such a fun game?
I do of course try to engage in some of the mutual matches but either they didn't actually like my profile or my quirky question of the week put them off... this week on Tinder... "If you could be a biscuit, what biscuit would you be, and why?"
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